Time - 3.43
Date - 29/3/2011
Location - ....
My KZN experience is drawing to a close. Soon I will be on the N3 highway listening to The Best of The Eighties eagerly waiting to see the Johannesburg skyline.
I leave the village that is Pietermaritzburg on Thursday the 31/3. I arrived in this town on the 6 October 2008. 1 Year and 5 months. I have to say, the experience is one I would not trade for anything. (OK, maybe a slice of Belgium Chocolate mousse cake served with a platinum spoon by James Franco would convince me to consider memory clearance therapy?)
I have worked, finding a career I am passionate about and excites me about the future. I have eaten - curries and desserts and things that I would never be able to spell, even if my sex life depended on it. I have complained - mostly to restaurants and mechanics. I have partied - till the early hours of the morning and in places that will never (trust me) ever make any "hot spot" list.
But the best part of my, "Eat,Pray,Love"esk experience is meeting amazing people. The folk of this town are friendly, warm and always inviting. I have met people that have molded me and taught me lessons about myself and life harsh but always fun, realities. I have met people that will forever be part of my life and a few that I would love to forget, but wont. Those people remind you to appreciate the ones that you love and that love you right back. Always willing to offer a helping hand, the people of Pietermaritzburg will always have a special place in my hearts.
My beautiful and courageous Grandmother, My feisty and brave Aunt, My Penis-cake-creating couple that I aspire to be as in all my future relationships and the one friend that has guided me through all my drama and given me sound advice, words can not translate. The gym group that invited me into their home and family. The Witness Staff that have all appreciated my humor and bared with me through all my sexual frustrations and bitch modes.
I bid thee adieu and wish you all the light, fun. money, passion and love filled life.
I will never forget you, (especially because we now have facebook and twitter and bbm)
Thank you for all the memories.
Tuesday, 29 March 2011
Monday, 28 March 2011
I had a dream, but I forgot....
Time - 3.49
Date - 28/3/2011
Location - PMB, KZN, South Africa
I hate my short term memory, its really bad. What do I eat to improve it? What?
I was typing out a kick ass blog post about food, all of a sudden I was rudely interrupted by a call from management. Closing the window but forgetting to save thus losing the post. My short - term memory (or rather lack there of) will not allow the information to be retrieved at this time, please stay tuned for future posts on food.
I am now sad.
People are stressing me out...
Im tired, Im stressed and Im on my death bed.
Moving is naaaaaaaaring.
Date - 28/3/2011
Location - PMB, KZN, South Africa
I hate my short term memory, its really bad. What do I eat to improve it? What?
I was typing out a kick ass blog post about food, all of a sudden I was rudely interrupted by a call from management. Closing the window but forgetting to save thus losing the post. My short - term memory (or rather lack there of) will not allow the information to be retrieved at this time, please stay tuned for future posts on food.
I am now sad.
People are stressing me out...
Im tired, Im stressed and Im on my death bed.
Moving is naaaaaaaaring.
Friday, 25 March 2011
Hell No, we wont Ho!
Time - 8.09
Date - 25/3/2011
Location - This place, KZN, South Africa
My head is full, and I feel a headache coming on. A few people are pissing me off. I have work on my desk and that's annoying. Lets get on that train shall we - Working for Nothing!
The state of the nation is a tizz about our president and his 6 wives, 21 children and lavish lifestyle. Lets not forget the family of Tenderpreneurs - sons, brothers, cousins (twice removed) and uncle Solly on the corner- whom have all failed to deliver what they promise. The lucrative contracts are signed and I can picture them licking their lips whilst imagining driving their new Mercedes SLC.
I hate it. I hate that our taxes, petrol, food and toilet-paper have all increased and our Government seems to be spitting in our faces. There is a new tolling system in Johannesburg, soon to become National. I hate it that good- hardworking people are working their asses off, not to be rich or even comfortable, but just to survive.
Organizations are exploiting their employees, leading to a demotivated and demoralised workforce. Commission cuts, increase refusals and a lack of consideration over reduced medical aid payments. A few companies are adding to the brew of disappointment and depression. (Dramatic, I know... But its true)
This unfair reality can be allied to a few relationships, where one cultivates and gives their best to make the most out of the situation but the outcome is not always satisfactory. It is almost enough to push one into a reclusive state, pack up the car and move to a small mountain town (the town where Angelina went in that movie with Uma Thurman's ex). What do you do when you are in love or love someone that constantly neglects your feelings and considers your opinion, thoughts and ideas as less important to their own. Your life is substandard? What then?
I have always adored the full on confrontational approach, but it gets exhausting and may feel as though you are hitting a brick wall, you then turn in to the real life version of the Eminem and Rihanna song. Towards the end of the argument, one gets tired and simply gives up. That is when the real danger begins, when you simply don't give enough of a shit to fight and you do whatever it takes to survive. Maybe, the best thing to do is remove yourself for the situation and call it quits before experiencing the Mood Indigo.
Easier said than done, I know. Because I am not striking at the office or driving off at the petrol stations or petitioning outside Jacob Zuma's 6th wife's house in Pretoria to buy my baby some bread. No, my ass is blogging and working and trying.
And hey:
Let me tell you something my Government, Boyfriend, Manager, Colleague and Friend. Screw you, because as that little boy picture says, "I know im special, cause God dont make no junk"
Love and kisses everyone
have an awesome day
Jarred
Date - 25/3/2011
Location - This place, KZN, South Africa
My head is full, and I feel a headache coming on. A few people are pissing me off. I have work on my desk and that's annoying. Lets get on that train shall we - Working for Nothing!
The state of the nation is a tizz about our president and his 6 wives, 21 children and lavish lifestyle. Lets not forget the family of Tenderpreneurs - sons, brothers, cousins (twice removed) and uncle Solly on the corner- whom have all failed to deliver what they promise. The lucrative contracts are signed and I can picture them licking their lips whilst imagining driving their new Mercedes SLC.
I hate it. I hate that our taxes, petrol, food and toilet-paper have all increased and our Government seems to be spitting in our faces. There is a new tolling system in Johannesburg, soon to become National. I hate it that good- hardworking people are working their asses off, not to be rich or even comfortable, but just to survive.
Organizations are exploiting their employees, leading to a demotivated and demoralised workforce. Commission cuts, increase refusals and a lack of consideration over reduced medical aid payments. A few companies are adding to the brew of disappointment and depression. (Dramatic, I know... But its true)
This unfair reality can be allied to a few relationships, where one cultivates and gives their best to make the most out of the situation but the outcome is not always satisfactory. It is almost enough to push one into a reclusive state, pack up the car and move to a small mountain town (the town where Angelina went in that movie with Uma Thurman's ex). What do you do when you are in love or love someone that constantly neglects your feelings and considers your opinion, thoughts and ideas as less important to their own. Your life is substandard? What then?
I have always adored the full on confrontational approach, but it gets exhausting and may feel as though you are hitting a brick wall, you then turn in to the real life version of the Eminem and Rihanna song. Towards the end of the argument, one gets tired and simply gives up. That is when the real danger begins, when you simply don't give enough of a shit to fight and you do whatever it takes to survive. Maybe, the best thing to do is remove yourself for the situation and call it quits before experiencing the Mood Indigo.
Easier said than done, I know. Because I am not striking at the office or driving off at the petrol stations or petitioning outside Jacob Zuma's 6th wife's house in Pretoria to buy my baby some bread. No, my ass is blogging and working and trying.
And hey:
Let me tell you something my Government, Boyfriend, Manager, Colleague and Friend. Screw you, because as that little boy picture says, "I know im special, cause God dont make no junk"
Love and kisses everyone
have an awesome day
Jarred
Thursday, 24 March 2011
Eish, Rand is Low
Time - 9.34
Date - 24/3/2011
Location - Yes, still Pietermaritzburg, KZN. South Africa
Last night, whilst bathing, I was contemplating what shall be the blog post today. I drew blanks. I could not figure out anything to type. Maybe, because it is the 24th day of the month and my petrol tank, bank account, wallet and self esteem are all depleted. Does money impact ones life to the extent that without it, we feel unloved and undervalued?
I have always been a firm believer, some might call me a traditionalist, that the man (usually the top for the gays) should be the higher earner. This however, is not always the case and in many instances the female (bottom, usually) is the wealthier party. The question is, how far are you willing to take the relationship when you are paying for the Sandton lunches and Melville cocktails and all he can afford is a Streetwise 2 on payday.
I like pretty things, and prefer purchasing said pretty things with my own hard earned capital. However, I would never refuse a gift, and appreciate it when someone special spent their hard earned capital to treat me, Its nice. So ladies and bottoms (usually) would you end a loving relationship because a man couldn't afford you or would you stick it out hoping that one day he actually sell a painting, or sorts out his metal-collection business or he gets a finally finishes that novel?
At this present moment, I have no idea what I would do. But then again, I am chatting to a doctor.
Love and Kisses
Date - 24/3/2011
Location - Yes, still Pietermaritzburg, KZN. South Africa
Last night, whilst bathing, I was contemplating what shall be the blog post today. I drew blanks. I could not figure out anything to type. Maybe, because it is the 24th day of the month and my petrol tank, bank account, wallet and self esteem are all depleted. Does money impact ones life to the extent that without it, we feel unloved and undervalued?
I have always been a firm believer, some might call me a traditionalist, that the man (usually the top for the gays) should be the higher earner. This however, is not always the case and in many instances the female (bottom, usually) is the wealthier party. The question is, how far are you willing to take the relationship when you are paying for the Sandton lunches and Melville cocktails and all he can afford is a Streetwise 2 on payday.
I like pretty things, and prefer purchasing said pretty things with my own hard earned capital. However, I would never refuse a gift, and appreciate it when someone special spent their hard earned capital to treat me, Its nice. So ladies and bottoms (usually) would you end a loving relationship because a man couldn't afford you or would you stick it out hoping that one day he actually sell a painting, or sorts out his metal-collection business or he gets a finally finishes that novel?
At this present moment, I have no idea what I would do. But then again, I am chatting to a doctor.
Love and Kisses
Wednesday, 23 March 2011
Elizabeth Taylor
Time - 3.34
Date - 23/3/2011
Location - Still Pietermaritzburg, KZN, South Africa
Elizabeth Taylor has passed away to the great stage in the sky. Im am truly sad and almost in tears (curse my icy heart), the difference is that unlike the posers that shall now post pictures and cry crocodile tears of their supposed love for her, I am genuenly feeling a great sense of loss.
Elizabeth was a star from the day she was born, she had ponies, a gay father an actress/model mother and an annoying brother that called her Lizzy the Lizard (which is why she hated being called Liz). Her Godfather was her fathers best "friend" and he treated her like a princess. She grew up sheltered and adored and as spoilt as the little girl that died on the pony in Gone with the Wind.
Her first taste of real life was when she married Nicky Hilton (The annoying Paris Hilton's grand uncle). Nicky was abusive and the bastard hit her like Ike did Tina, it was then she realised that life was not all peaches and cream and colourful rainbows. A hard lesson we all learn eventually.
Elizabeth Taylor was married 8 times, a true trooper for love.Many feel that Richard Burton, the man she married twice, was the love of her life. Truth is, the insecure asshole was jealous of her success. Her second husband was her true love, he challenged her and ignited her passions without indulging her spoilt-brat-childish-spirit. I imagine their sex-life being wild and frequent. (not that I pictured her naked or anything) He died in a plane crash, she married his best friend.
Her friends included, Rock Hudson, Montgomery Clift, James Dean and Micheal Jackson. Making her the original Fag Hag. She made us lover jewelery, furs, drinking, drugging and living through it all. A woman that lived without any apologies, a great role model, entertainer and human -being.
Heres to you Ms Taylor,
Date - 23/3/2011
Location - Still Pietermaritzburg, KZN, South Africa
Elizabeth Taylor has passed away to the great stage in the sky. Im am truly sad and almost in tears (curse my icy heart), the difference is that unlike the posers that shall now post pictures and cry crocodile tears of their supposed love for her, I am genuenly feeling a great sense of loss.
Elizabeth was a star from the day she was born, she had ponies, a gay father an actress/model mother and an annoying brother that called her Lizzy the Lizard (which is why she hated being called Liz). Her Godfather was her fathers best "friend" and he treated her like a princess. She grew up sheltered and adored and as spoilt as the little girl that died on the pony in Gone with the Wind.
Her first taste of real life was when she married Nicky Hilton (The annoying Paris Hilton's grand uncle). Nicky was abusive and the bastard hit her like Ike did Tina, it was then she realised that life was not all peaches and cream and colourful rainbows. A hard lesson we all learn eventually.
Elizabeth Taylor was married 8 times, a true trooper for love.Many feel that Richard Burton, the man she married twice, was the love of her life. Truth is, the insecure asshole was jealous of her success. Her second husband was her true love, he challenged her and ignited her passions without indulging her spoilt-brat-childish-spirit. I imagine their sex-life being wild and frequent. (not that I pictured her naked or anything) He died in a plane crash, she married his best friend.
Her friends included, Rock Hudson, Montgomery Clift, James Dean and Micheal Jackson. Making her the original Fag Hag. She made us lover jewelery, furs, drinking, drugging and living through it all. A woman that lived without any apologies, a great role model, entertainer and human -being.
Heres to you Ms Taylor,
For the Love of Crocs?
Time - 9.45
Date - 23/3/2011
Location - still Pietermaritzburg, KZN. South Africa
My first blog was a raging success. Much like my fashion sense, the response was fabulous.
Although one of my comments included a lovey analogy of love being different pairs of shoes, my desire for love was equated to a pair of crocs. Crocs? The nasty shoe that made people feel as if they were saving the planet every time they put those hideous excuses of footwear on their feet. They came in various colours, each one revolting. Although I did have a pair - because they were trendy - They are now rotting in my grandmothers back garden.
The concept of comfort over style has always alluded me, why would you sacrifice something that makes you feel so good, like the new Kurt Geiger Lothbury loafers, for something that is just comfortable. So may I be so bold and equate a man to fashion, i shall. I want a man to stimulate my senses and ignite my passions, to know what excites me and to understand my vulnerabilities. Accept my flaws and delight in my success. This thinking is partly my Pisces nature and growing up watching all the romance movies I could get my hands on.
Naive, i know, but why the hell not want something that seems unattainable?
So ladies and gentlemen, never utter the phrase, "at least he is better than other girls boyfriends" or "Let me just slip on the old trackpants, its just a movie" Wear the Prada dress that thrills you and find the man that make you feel the same way your favourite fabulous outfit does.But remember one thing, dresses don't last forever, and sometimes love doesn't either, but that's OK.
Make your life your own... No Excuses.
love and kisses...
Date - 23/3/2011
Location - still Pietermaritzburg, KZN. South Africa
My first blog was a raging success. Much like my fashion sense, the response was fabulous.
Although one of my comments included a lovey analogy of love being different pairs of shoes, my desire for love was equated to a pair of crocs. Crocs? The nasty shoe that made people feel as if they were saving the planet every time they put those hideous excuses of footwear on their feet. They came in various colours, each one revolting. Although I did have a pair - because they were trendy - They are now rotting in my grandmothers back garden.
The concept of comfort over style has always alluded me, why would you sacrifice something that makes you feel so good, like the new Kurt Geiger Lothbury loafers, for something that is just comfortable. So may I be so bold and equate a man to fashion, i shall. I want a man to stimulate my senses and ignite my passions, to know what excites me and to understand my vulnerabilities. Accept my flaws and delight in my success. This thinking is partly my Pisces nature and growing up watching all the romance movies I could get my hands on.
Naive, i know, but why the hell not want something that seems unattainable?
So ladies and gentlemen, never utter the phrase, "at least he is better than other girls boyfriends" or "Let me just slip on the old trackpants, its just a movie" Wear the Prada dress that thrills you and find the man that make you feel the same way your favourite fabulous outfit does.But remember one thing, dresses don't last forever, and sometimes love doesn't either, but that's OK.
Make your life your own... No Excuses.
love and kisses...
Tuesday, 22 March 2011
First Blog
Time - 3.11pm
Date - 22/3/2011
Location - Pietermaritzburg, Kwazulu Natal. South Africa
So here it is, my very first Blog. Im not feeling too inspired.
A brief background., for the past 14 months i have lived in the village that is Pietermaritzburg. I have had a great time full of memorable experiences, some good and some not so good, but all experiences.
Today I am filling out my months notice at The Witness Newspaper, where i am an advertising consultant. Im moving to Brainstorm magazine on the 31 March and starting on the 1 April (Fools day). - please God dont let this all be a joke.
My sex life is dwindling, although Im being asked out more than ever before, the boys just aren't giving it up as freely as they used to? Why is that? Oh yes, and in case you haven't guessed, I am a Homosexual. Although a few of my straight girlfriends are going through the same sort of drought. Are men becoming more feminine and females becoming more masculine? Who knows?All i know is that im faced with a Bisexual that cannot get it hard and a doctor that is so torn by the fact that im leaving that he cannot bear to see me on a daily basis. Lying bastards!
I am now 24 and i am quite ashamed of the fact that my entire sexual history is a collection of one-night stands and a few fuck buddies. This is not what God and mother nature intended. My goodness, i am a walking stereotype.
So no I am on a quest to find someone special (or at least know their name) to do the deed with, i shall no longer be a slut, and I will pursue the quest of "true love" (oh God).
See ya
Jarred
Date - 22/3/2011
Location - Pietermaritzburg, Kwazulu Natal. South Africa
So here it is, my very first Blog. Im not feeling too inspired.
A brief background., for the past 14 months i have lived in the village that is Pietermaritzburg. I have had a great time full of memorable experiences, some good and some not so good, but all experiences.
Today I am filling out my months notice at The Witness Newspaper, where i am an advertising consultant. Im moving to Brainstorm magazine on the 31 March and starting on the 1 April (Fools day). - please God dont let this all be a joke.
My sex life is dwindling, although Im being asked out more than ever before, the boys just aren't giving it up as freely as they used to? Why is that? Oh yes, and in case you haven't guessed, I am a Homosexual. Although a few of my straight girlfriends are going through the same sort of drought. Are men becoming more feminine and females becoming more masculine? Who knows?All i know is that im faced with a Bisexual that cannot get it hard and a doctor that is so torn by the fact that im leaving that he cannot bear to see me on a daily basis. Lying bastards!
I am now 24 and i am quite ashamed of the fact that my entire sexual history is a collection of one-night stands and a few fuck buddies. This is not what God and mother nature intended. My goodness, i am a walking stereotype.
So no I am on a quest to find someone special (or at least know their name) to do the deed with, i shall no longer be a slut, and I will pursue the quest of "true love" (oh God).
See ya
Jarred
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